Building Roots with Kids

For some reason, I have an urgency, a burden - to build some deep roots into my kids while they are young...


My biological dad and I reconnected about 5 years ago after a 15 year gap with no contact and before that we had periodic visits on holidays.  It's a long story but I really love my dad.


As we have tried to reconnect and get to know each other, I discovered something in that process.  There is no way we can recreate what I call the "root building" phase of parenting. 


This is the phase where we just spend a lot of quantity time together... building trust, learning about each other, learning little things as you hang out. 


I think there was a desire for both my dad and I to go through this phase together on some level. 


But we had to be realistic, this phase of our relationship had passed and could not be fully regained.


The child basically revolves around the parents when they still have the freedom to... as they grow and eventually build their own families then they invest their energy there.  This is where I am today.


This experience with my dad has burnt this lesson into me.


I have to build some deep relational roots with my kids now... it is THE time to do this. 


I remember some older guys telling me, "don't worry about working hard when your kids are young, they won't remember that you were gone". 
Now that I am in this phase of life, I have to say, I couldn't disagree more. 
It's one thing if the circumstances of our life forced me to be gone (military, etc). 
But because of what I've experienced, there's no way I could make a concious choice to be disengaged or a minimal part of their lives during this phase. 


Perhaps this is just my conviction. 
But now having been on boths sides of this equation, it makes a lot of sense to me.


"...and parents are the pride of their children." Proverbs 17:6


Ryan